Hearts of Hope for a Cure

of Childhood Cancer

      **PLEASE DO NOT TAKE OR COPY MY POEMS**                          These poems were written by me during Seth's journey, and some after. They are very personal from my heart, but for awareness I am willing to share.

 
          THE BEAUTY OF YOUR CANCER
 
 
THE BEAUTY OF YOUR CANCER IS ~ YOUR SPIRIT SHINING THROUGH IT,
YOUR SMILE AND YOUR LAUGHTER TELL ME YOU WILL MAKE IT THROUGH THIS,
PRAYERS AROUND THE WORLD AND ALL INCLUDE YOUR NAME,
THE BEAUTY OF YOUR CANCER IS~ OUR LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME,
YOU HAVE TOUCHED THE HEARTS OF STRANGERS,
AND NOW THEIRS ARE TOUCHING YOURS,
YOU HAVE TOUCHED THE HEARTS OF FAMILY WHO HAVE SEEN MIRACLES,
AND HOPE FOR CURES,
YOU HAVE TOUCHED THE NURSES AND DOCTORS WHO HAVE WATCHED YOU OVERCOME YOUR OBSTACLES,
THE BEAUTY OF YOUR CANCER IS~  ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE,
THE DAY WE ALMOST LOST YOU,
THE DAY THAT YOU "SURVIVED",
I TOOK A GOOD LOOK BACK,
AND DECIDED TO CHANGE OUR LIVES,
I REALIZED WHAT WAS MISSING, WHAT WAS IMPORTANT, AND WHAT WE NEEDED,
THE BEAUTY OF YOUR CANCER IS~ IT TOOK THE CANCER FOR ME TO SEE IT,
OUR FAMILY BOND IS CLOSER NOW,
THE LOVE WE SHARE IS TRUE,
WE TREASURE EVERY MINUTE,
AND ITS ALL BECAUSE OF YOU,
YOU INSPIRE OTHER FAMILIES WHO ARE GOING THROUGH THE SAME,
YOUR SMILE AND YOUR SPIRIT SEEM TO EASE THEIR PAIN,YOU HAVE CHANGED SO MANY PEOPLE,AND RAISED HOPE IN MANY TOO,
THE BEAUTY OF YOUR CANCER IS YOU.
 Written by:TINA (SETHS MOM)10-07

 
 
P.N.E.T. Tumor doesn't sound like much
 
A P.N.E.T. tumor took my son from me,
my life, my love, my baby.
How cruel the word "CANCER" can be,
I watched him fight, my hero, my pride,
one day a time, I prayed at his side.
 
A P.N.E.T. tumor doesn't sound like much,
but it changed my whole life with its cancerous touch.
Silently it grew inside my precious son,
it hid inside his perfect body until the age of 1.
It started with some symptoms, all could be explained,
but as the symptoms grew the mothers instincts also came.
I couldn't help but think that something worse was going on,
I could see it in his eyes...something else was wrong.
 
Finally the symptoms showed a much uglier side,
the news from the Cat Scan showed my son was going to die.
It wasn't checked for sooner (not because they didn't care),
insurance won't allow those test.....for something that is rare.
You can't test for "what if's" if the chances are so few,
test him for the obvious, is what they're told to do.
 
A P.N.E.T. tumor doesn't sound like much,
but it broke my heart forever and left me longing for my sons touch.
 
This cancer is strong and rare...he must fight.
Funding is scarce and there is no cure in sight.
The chemical cocktails are toxic and cruel, but they still may not kill the cancer you.
Why does no one know of this, if awareness is the key?
Why are so few fighting for a cure to this disease?
P.N.E.T. tumors...but the numbers are so few.....
You'll care that its forgotten if it ever touches you.
 
A P.N.E.T. tumor doesn't sound like much,
But my baby is now an angel from its cancerous touch.
Written by: Tina Cook-Becker (angel Seth's momma)'09

Trapped inside

Its trapped inside, although you may not see,
this crippling sadness inside of me.
I struggle each day just to get out of bed,
and to find a distraction to the thoughts in my head:
  of how much I miss him,
  and what could have been,
  and who wrote the book of this life that I am in.
I want to turn back the pages,
I want to read it again,
the parts with him in it,
and I want to re write the end....

Its trapped inside, although you may not see,
the hole in my heart that I carry with me.
For he was my heart, and now I am not whole,
I'am forever broken, deep in my soul.

I hide it with a smile,
I act is if I'am fine,
because the world around me thinks that it has been enough time.
Enough time to mourn, enough time to grieve,
"time to move on" is what they say to me.

Its trapped inside, because you don't want to see,
the sadness that time will not take from me.
Time won't make it easier,
time won't ease my pain,
time won't fill the hole in my heart,
and I will never be the same.

But in time I learned to smile and to say that I am fine,
because the world around me thinks that it has been enough time.
So its trapped inside, so you don't have to see,
this crippling sadness forever in me.

(Written by:Tina Becker 2009)

 
 
A new "normal"
 
 
 
 
I lost my child and a piece of my heart,
I held him with tears in my eyes the day he was born,
I held him with tears in my eyes on the day he did part.
Now I am left behind on this earth,
why my child, and not me I wonder,,
But I am left to move on despite the pain I live under.
I have to move on because the world doesn't stand still for a broken hearted mother whose child fell ill.
A disease with no cure, but eight months of a fight,
from a tiny little body, that shone with GODS light.
So full of joy and love, yet so broken,
We had a bond that no language has a word to be spoken.
Forever 2 he will live in my heart and my soul,
His memory is with me wherever I go.
my life is not the same,
my "normal" is new,
I learned a lot of lessons on the journey we went through,
I learned that true love never does die,
I learned that true joy will always make you cry,
I learned of children suffering, some near, and some so far,
I learned a simple act of kindness can change who you are.
I learned in the rush of the world we live in,
we often miss the beauty of the moment we are in.
I learned that in the end it is the little things that we would miss the most,
the things that time takes by so fast,
in a blink its in the past,
so hold those moments close.
I am a broken hearted mother,
and I've learned so much, its true,
my life will never be the same,
my "normal" now is new.
 
Written by: Tina Cook-Becker 
(angel Seth's momma) 12-25-09